Wednesday, March 15, 2017
As per today, i have the best ride to work as usual. I dont exactly know how to describe the feeling --- of riding together to work-- i would best relate it to intimacy/the closeness. Surely it is one of surreal thing.
I arrived late. 3 minutes delayed. The first red mark on my punch card. i care not to this matter. hahahaha.
Secondly, a news i received from someone higher (in authority) which brings the dullness all of sudden. i hate to say this, or even to think of this more than i should do. I just want to say this, DonT count on other especially when it relates to your work. i discovered myself on why other person can misjudge you because of your innocent wrongdoings. its clear that i can see some of this irresponsible people that do harm "unintentionally".
i dont wanna be the eternal judge on this matter. Let Him do His work cause He knows everything than we did.
Tuesday, March 14, 2017
coming back to the office, i started to feel curious. i really don't know why i always be in an awkward feeling among the officers. they are the juniors who recently work in the branch and whenever i speak to my assistant, their friends will giggle and it seems to me that there is some story being spread behind me. sometimes, it does disturb my feeling. being my assistant, there are a lot of task to be done quickly, you need to rush, you have no proper meal time, i do so. so if i can do that, you too have to the same. we work in equivalent work load. no more, and no less. i even did myself for tasks which i prefer to do own my own.
I hope this ends quick. i really have no time to think of it deeper. the sooner it disappear, the better it will be.
i just want to stop now.
im having this menstrual cramp.
and actually it is the menstrual cramp im having. not a panic cramp!.
I am panic because i need to write this.
Sunday, June 26, 2016
I think i wrote the wrong title for this post, since its almost end of the year. Hahaha. showing how short minded my mind is. Well, i have been wanting to write since ages... But, the post end up in the draft (as usual).
I have been wanting to write now.
But, sort of loosing ideas.
Just thinking of my son. He is unwell. Having flu and hard to sleep last night. I only had 4 hours sleep last night and we were so worried that his temperature raised. This morning, he seems better and i hope he can recover sooner.
Well, he is not really adapt to this metropolitan air (i guess). This dense city is so crowded and polluted and i forgot that i should not bring my kid in the public like we always did when in Tronoh. Here, a bit suffocating. and I feel deranged too (sometimes). Fortuitously, we managed to have a place to rent nearby greenly area.
Note to myself: I need to always remember to think twice, thrice before deciding to go outing with my boy. Look for spacious and comfortable place so that we can breath cleaner air. hahaha
Till then, Assalamualaikum..
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
Thursday, April 9, 2015
|A. M. Umar bin M. Affiq|
|Love u to moon then surround the universe!!|
Sunday, January 18, 2015
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
I wish i could write it anytime i want, whenever the idea pop out like this time-- at this moment... i believe this is the only medium that i could express my feelings, my thoughts of any issue, critically criticize in any aspects it should be criticize.
I--- should never question a holiness of someone which is superior than me in which their level are beyond my degree of authority. When they are higher in ranking of respect, i expect them to teach me or at least i learn a lot of positive life values to be applied in my future. But then, when comes the unethical values potrayed in their action; i started to question the holiness of the person. In return, the respect u have for that kind of person, will decrease. I am not sure if you can understand this, but let me give you an example. If to debate on religion point of view, u would never argue with an ustaz or ustazah which we know that they are expert in that area and when they slightly done any mistake in the public, people will smack them down like they never ever did any good things before. That is how the reaction of our society towards this kind of issue. You must show a good example to the people around you so that no finger will be pointed towards you on inappropriate actions.
So, here in my case, i am no longer a toddler that can be cheated on any result you made. I am here to judge and i can value myself what kind of people you are. This is general principle ethics that you must always think good of others, never make any speculation towards others unless you witness yourself the wrongdoings they have made. But that is still not enough to drop any conclusion that a person is bad. Its your eyes that may trick you. I always wanted my now and future to be different from what i was raised. To change the negativity mindset into positive ones.. too much influence from badmouth people will destroy our peaceful mind and judgement. So stay away from this people.
In 2015; i wish and work to become a better person than i am before. Become an understanding mother to my dearest son, splendid wife to my lovable husband and a pious slave to my Creator. InshaAllah. My vision is to still perform the sunnah like i did before continously, becoming more humble and work hard to finish my phd studies.